Location can be a reason why some relationships end.This is because no many people find it difficult to keep the flame of love glowing across the Atlantic ocean.This is just an example of a long distance relationship.It doesn't have to be across the Atlantic ocean to have for location to be a factor.
Two lovers could be in the same city and be seperated by a prison wall.It is difficult to keep in touch when one may be behind bars with limited access to visitors and the other person is outside struggling to make ends meet or dealing with the daily temptations that comes with freedom.Out of sight is out of mind ,unless you find ways to keep each other emotionally connected.
If you lived together with your spouse you could always find things to do together like go to the movies,go to the restaurants or even go to theme parks with family which can help keep you emotionally connected,when you live in different parts of the country,everything becomes more challenging.You are limited to keeping in touch through phone calls ,texting or internet connections.Though these may help ,they are no substitutes for holding hands together and sharing your feelings.
I know of a friend who loved his girlfriend dearly before he traveled outside the country.Initially he called every day on the phone ,then it became weekly ,then monthly ,then when ever possible.Once I found out my friend called his beloved only 'when ever possible', I knew their relationship was in trouble.Not long after wards they broke up.
If you have a really good relationship and one of you has to relocate on account of job demands ,I am sure you will not like to end up like my friend.Those ,who have been able to avoid the location pitfall in relationships tell me that what they did was keep in touch regularly by any means available,including phone calls and text messages.They also sent each other surprise gifts and took advantage of every holiday or break at work to visit each other.
They said it was a lot of hard work but in the end it made their relationship more romantic .How did they do it? Instead of allowing location to lead to the end of their relationship,they used their different locations to make things more unpredictable and exciting,this put the spice back in their love lives.
For more ways to keep your relationship more romantic click on Questions to help couples live better where you will find more romantic ideas.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Monday, December 20, 2010
Imperfections-reasons men leave their families
One of the reasons men leave their families is that they are constantly reminded of their imperfections and failure.Can you imagine ,how you would feel if every time you shared an idea with your spouse ,it was shot down as one more stupid idea from you.
This is followed by a tirade on your imperfections and how marrying you has been one of the worst decisions of their lives.Do not even try to explain that .Every attempt at trying to explain is seen as an exercise in excuse making.If this continues for a sustained period of time ,there is one way for the relationship to go.It will without doubt go South.
Most men do not have the psychological skill to know that sometimes those imperfection- based attacks are a sign of hunger for emotional engagement between spouses and react immediately to such tirades with an attack of their own.This is because most men believe that an attack is the best form of defence.
This kind of thinking prevents couples from finding out the underlying emotional and communications problems which can only be resolved by a more open discussion.
Visit The relationship mending system to find out even more ways to revive and enjoy your relationships.
This is followed by a tirade on your imperfections and how marrying you has been one of the worst decisions of their lives.Do not even try to explain that .Every attempt at trying to explain is seen as an exercise in excuse making.If this continues for a sustained period of time ,there is one way for the relationship to go.It will without doubt go South.
Most men do not have the psychological skill to know that sometimes those imperfection- based attacks are a sign of hunger for emotional engagement between spouses and react immediately to such tirades with an attack of their own.This is because most men believe that an attack is the best form of defence.
This kind of thinking prevents couples from finding out the underlying emotional and communications problems which can only be resolved by a more open discussion.
Visit The relationship mending system to find out even more ways to revive and enjoy your relationships.
How Finances can Affect your Relationships
Everybody says that money cannot buy happiness but we also know that it cannot buy sadness either.Of course how we relate to money can lead to either sadness or joy in our relationships.
However if you are in a relationship where money is so tight, that the ability to buy food daily is a hassle then be prepared to deal with a lot of arguments and frustrations due to increased emotional tension .This situation is made worse by one spouse working and the other not working or spending a lot of time just watching TV.
If the working spouse is convinced that the other person is not doing all she or he can to make things better,then the dimension of trust becomes part of relationship equation.This is usually dangerous.No relationship can survive for along time without trust.Mistrust will lead to a tendency to double check everything your spouse does.This will ultimately lead to a loss of intimacy.
If you think about it ,this is not really surprising .Are you prepared to hug a person you do not trust?I would probably hug such a person reluctantly.But I am sure,I shall not be giving that person a deep warm hug.This is because it is difficult open your heart to some one you do not trust.Once this happens the emotional disruption that follows will lead to more cycles of anger and heated arguments.
This is just one of the ways poor finances can affect your relationship.The funny thing though is that even in relationships with adequate finances, how the money is spent can still lead to problems.In this case one spouse,may either feel that he or she is not involved in the decision making process or not allowed enough autonomy to make financial decisions.Either thought process will result in resentment which can very easily to open confrontations.
It is easy to see that finances one way or another can affect the relationships of both the rich and the poor.However ,the key to reducing emotional tension related to financial issues is to be more open with your thoughts,plans,expectations and worries.This will help foster greater understanding and love in your relationships.
Visit The relationship mending system to find out even more ways to revive and enjoy your relationships.
However if you are in a relationship where money is so tight, that the ability to buy food daily is a hassle then be prepared to deal with a lot of arguments and frustrations due to increased emotional tension .This situation is made worse by one spouse working and the other not working or spending a lot of time just watching TV.
If the working spouse is convinced that the other person is not doing all she or he can to make things better,then the dimension of trust becomes part of relationship equation.This is usually dangerous.No relationship can survive for along time without trust.Mistrust will lead to a tendency to double check everything your spouse does.This will ultimately lead to a loss of intimacy.
If you think about it ,this is not really surprising .Are you prepared to hug a person you do not trust?I would probably hug such a person reluctantly.But I am sure,I shall not be giving that person a deep warm hug.This is because it is difficult open your heart to some one you do not trust.Once this happens the emotional disruption that follows will lead to more cycles of anger and heated arguments.
This is just one of the ways poor finances can affect your relationship.The funny thing though is that even in relationships with adequate finances, how the money is spent can still lead to problems.In this case one spouse,may either feel that he or she is not involved in the decision making process or not allowed enough autonomy to make financial decisions.Either thought process will result in resentment which can very easily to open confrontations.
It is easy to see that finances one way or another can affect the relationships of both the rich and the poor.However ,the key to reducing emotional tension related to financial issues is to be more open with your thoughts,plans,expectations and worries.This will help foster greater understanding and love in your relationships.
Visit The relationship mending system to find out even more ways to revive and enjoy your relationships.
Friday, November 19, 2010
Don't Let It End Stop My Divorce
If you are going through that difficult time when your relationship with your lover feels like it is coming to an end and you find yourself pleading for some thing to be done.You may even be saying, "Someone, please stop my divorce!" you aren't alone. There are many who have gone through it and saved their marriage and many more who didn't.Whatever the outcome you can still ways to make yourself happy again afterward. There are things that you can do to help stop a divorce or correct problems before they get to that point.
The first thing to remember is that as much as you may want to save your relationship you may not be able to do so.This is because saving a relationship will depend on more than one person .Make sure that you prepare yourself mentally for any possible outcome. This isn't thinking pessimistically, it is being realistic which is what you need to be. It is hard to predict the future
.
In some families meditation starts with relatives trying to help.Where ,this fails or is not acceptable, may make use of family therapy or seek out marriage counselors the only options left.. They have been well trained and have lots of experience helping people go through these difficult times. Even if there is adultery involved, they will be able to help. Many marriages have been brought back from the edge because of counseling and therapy. They are accustomed to dealing with infidelity between spouses, depression, or any other things that stress a relationship to the point of divorce. Marriage counseling doesn't have to be expensive, there are plenty of good choices for you to use to get good relationship advice before you see a divorce lawyer.
Another thing that you can learn not to do that may help stop your divorce before you ever get an attorney involved is don't argue about everything.My friend calls it winning by losing. Arguing will only make the situation worse. You can try calling it reasoning or what ever but the truth is you are trying to force them to feel differently than they do. If you are serious and you want to "stop my divorce" then realize that your battle is against your separation, not your spouse. The more you argue with them and try to point out where they are wrong the more they will be wrong in your mind.
Don't try to defend yourself. You may be right, but don't try to convince them of that. Find the truth in their argument and agree with that. The more you can agree with the things they say, the more they will be right. This will only make them see that you are willing to do what you want them to do, see your side of the story. If you are willing to be honest and accept what they are trying to say then they will more likely be open to listening to your side.There is no substitute for good communication in relationships. Marriage counseling is great at helping you understand how to communicate better if you really want to "stop my divorce."
This is only one part of the things that you can do to help when you are wanting someone to help you "stop my divorce". Quit talking about it and start acting on it. Your marriage will only have a chance to survive if you are willing to act.The journey of a thousand miles begins with a step,so it is important to start with the smallest act possible.Something as simple as a card.
To learn more secrets to building a great relationship and making your relationships better click on this.
The first thing to remember is that as much as you may want to save your relationship you may not be able to do so.This is because saving a relationship will depend on more than one person .Make sure that you prepare yourself mentally for any possible outcome. This isn't thinking pessimistically, it is being realistic which is what you need to be. It is hard to predict the future
.
In some families meditation starts with relatives trying to help.Where ,this fails or is not acceptable, may make use of family therapy or seek out marriage counselors the only options left.. They have been well trained and have lots of experience helping people go through these difficult times. Even if there is adultery involved, they will be able to help. Many marriages have been brought back from the edge because of counseling and therapy. They are accustomed to dealing with infidelity between spouses, depression, or any other things that stress a relationship to the point of divorce. Marriage counseling doesn't have to be expensive, there are plenty of good choices for you to use to get good relationship advice before you see a divorce lawyer.
Another thing that you can learn not to do that may help stop your divorce before you ever get an attorney involved is don't argue about everything.My friend calls it winning by losing. Arguing will only make the situation worse. You can try calling it reasoning or what ever but the truth is you are trying to force them to feel differently than they do. If you are serious and you want to "stop my divorce" then realize that your battle is against your separation, not your spouse. The more you argue with them and try to point out where they are wrong the more they will be wrong in your mind.
Don't try to defend yourself. You may be right, but don't try to convince them of that. Find the truth in their argument and agree with that. The more you can agree with the things they say, the more they will be right. This will only make them see that you are willing to do what you want them to do, see your side of the story. If you are willing to be honest and accept what they are trying to say then they will more likely be open to listening to your side.There is no substitute for good communication in relationships. Marriage counseling is great at helping you understand how to communicate better if you really want to "stop my divorce."
This is only one part of the things that you can do to help when you are wanting someone to help you "stop my divorce". Quit talking about it and start acting on it. Your marriage will only have a chance to survive if you are willing to act.The journey of a thousand miles begins with a step,so it is important to start with the smallest act possible.Something as simple as a card.
To learn more secrets to building a great relationship and making your relationships better click on this.
Monday, November 8, 2010
Getting your guy back,if you want him.
Getting your guy back after a break up,if you want him ,can be difficult especially if he broke up with you. You probably don't feel or even act like yourself at this point. Life almost seems like it has lost its meaning with him in it. At this point your emotions are down and you may even be feeling depressed.
Getting back with someone who broke up with you can be a very difficult task,especially if you were not expecting the break up For whatever reason, the other person decided that it was time to let go. They just wanted it to end. It's usually easier to work out a relationship while you're still in it; as opposed to when it has ended.At least this is what conventional wisdom says.
With that being said, you can get a guy back if he broke up with you. The most critical aspect to this is you are absolutely positive that getting back with him is exactly what you want. Are you sure it is what you want? Make sure your motives for getting back with him are the right ones. Don't want him back just to have him back or to prove to your friends that nobody walks out on you.
The second most important aspect to getting your guy back is to realize that it doesn't. work all the time.Try with realistic expectations. Some people can make up and move on. Others, they just can't recapture the magic of the relationship they once shared. Do not allow fear of the unknown stop you from trying.
If you want to get your guy back, you must,first get your emotions in check. Guys do not want to be with women who can't keep their emotions under control.Not that the guys always do better with their own emotions If you attempt to contact him while you don't have control of your emotions you may do even more damage. For example, if he was starting to miss you and think about you, but you contact him and you're an emotional mess, you may make him realize that his choice to break up with you was the right one.
The best thing you can do is instead of worrying about what he's doing.Even if you feel sad that you don't have him, take steps to keep on living your own life. You must prove to him that you can be mature about this breakup. Keep up with your daily routines. Do your hair nice, wear makeup, wear clothes that make you feel good about yourself. Hang out with your mutual friends.
If you're staying active and living your life without bothering him, you will have a better chance to get him back. If you stay out of contact with him, no calls, no email, no text messages, nothing, you'll probably find that he will eventually call you, or get in touch with you.
When he does, just keep it brief. Tell him how busy you've been. Don't get mushy or gush out feelings for him. Act indifferent and aloof. This will confuse him. If he wants to see you again, make sure you look your best. Don't let him touch you or kiss you. Before you leave, if you want, give him a hug but that's it. This will drive him crazy. From this point, you should be able to get your guy back pretty easily. Just take it slow.
As you can see,to get your guy back, you just have work on getting your emotions under control. Live your life to the fullest. Always look your best, because that will help you to feel your best.Once you feel your best you will glitter. Back off, give him space. This will give him time to really miss you. He'll most likely contact you and want to see you again. When he does, be a little bit of a tease. Make him work for your affections again.This way he will value you more and comeback with greater intensity.
When you do get back,make sure you set the ground rules of the relationship this time,so that you do not get hurt again.Click on make it better by making up
Getting back with someone who broke up with you can be a very difficult task,especially if you were not expecting the break up For whatever reason, the other person decided that it was time to let go. They just wanted it to end. It's usually easier to work out a relationship while you're still in it; as opposed to when it has ended.At least this is what conventional wisdom says.
With that being said, you can get a guy back if he broke up with you. The most critical aspect to this is you are absolutely positive that getting back with him is exactly what you want. Are you sure it is what you want? Make sure your motives for getting back with him are the right ones. Don't want him back just to have him back or to prove to your friends that nobody walks out on you.
The second most important aspect to getting your guy back is to realize that it doesn't. work all the time.Try with realistic expectations. Some people can make up and move on. Others, they just can't recapture the magic of the relationship they once shared. Do not allow fear of the unknown stop you from trying.
If you want to get your guy back, you must,first get your emotions in check. Guys do not want to be with women who can't keep their emotions under control.Not that the guys always do better with their own emotions If you attempt to contact him while you don't have control of your emotions you may do even more damage. For example, if he was starting to miss you and think about you, but you contact him and you're an emotional mess, you may make him realize that his choice to break up with you was the right one.
The best thing you can do is instead of worrying about what he's doing.Even if you feel sad that you don't have him, take steps to keep on living your own life. You must prove to him that you can be mature about this breakup. Keep up with your daily routines. Do your hair nice, wear makeup, wear clothes that make you feel good about yourself. Hang out with your mutual friends.
If you're staying active and living your life without bothering him, you will have a better chance to get him back. If you stay out of contact with him, no calls, no email, no text messages, nothing, you'll probably find that he will eventually call you, or get in touch with you.
When he does, just keep it brief. Tell him how busy you've been. Don't get mushy or gush out feelings for him. Act indifferent and aloof. This will confuse him. If he wants to see you again, make sure you look your best. Don't let him touch you or kiss you. Before you leave, if you want, give him a hug but that's it. This will drive him crazy. From this point, you should be able to get your guy back pretty easily. Just take it slow.
As you can see,to get your guy back, you just have work on getting your emotions under control. Live your life to the fullest. Always look your best, because that will help you to feel your best.Once you feel your best you will glitter. Back off, give him space. This will give him time to really miss you. He'll most likely contact you and want to see you again. When he does, be a little bit of a tease. Make him work for your affections again.This way he will value you more and comeback with greater intensity.
When you do get back,make sure you set the ground rules of the relationship this time,so that you do not get hurt again.Click on make it better by making up
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Six important things to remember about dating girls.
It is always important to remember that dating is not a game. Whether you enjoy dating or find it difficult, you have to remember that it involves dealing with emotions.Emotions are like fire,the can cook for you or burn down the house.So, much as you know that if you are ever going to find the one person who can be the love of your life , you have to date one way or another. So, here is some good advice for you.
The first thing to remember is that girls are not boys.What you consider funny they may consider gross.
They may not think it is funny to make noises by placing your hands over your mouth like if you just farted.It is not funny to pull off your shirt and try to lick your armpit. Even if they have had too much to drink, they don’t like this. Do not set your self up for failure.
The second thing to remember do not think it is cool to tell stories about your previous exploits.Would you like to hear her own previous stories with the minute details?My guess is know.In that case treat your date the respect you would like to be treated. They do not want to know about the blonde who had nothing to say but had the most amazing body ever created. Nor do they think it is awesome to have their guy greeted by every lady in the restaurant. Take your date to a different place just to be on the safe side and do not mention your previous relationships..
The third thing to remember is to show up on time.It is rude to keep you date waiting or fail to show at all.By being there on time ,you say with more than words to your girl that she is very important to you.Trust me every body wants to be treated with respect and dignity.No matter what,do not be late.If you cannot help it,call ahead of time and explain.
The fourth thing to remember is that most girls would be happy to see you looking good.. They do not like to see you show up at their door in your dirty old jeans with a cheap fast food in your hand. Trust me on this one. Maybe later – way later, like after the kids have grown up – it will be okay for this kind of slip of the mind to happen. But for now, please, guys:shave and look good ,let your date know that she means something to you.
The fifth thing to remember is that your girl will not be impressed with how cheap you are. She will not not love it when you pull out buy-one-get-one-free coupons at the restaurant cash register. There is nothing wrong with a bargain, especially in these tough economic times, but use those freebies when you go out with your dad ,if you ever do that.May be your friends will admire your smarts if you do that, but don't give your date the impression that she is not worth that much.
The sixth thing remember is that girls may not find burping and peeing contests hilariously interesting and entertaining. Who can come up with most-silent-but-most-deadly one without any prior warning is nothing to be proud of, according to most girls.Their might be a few who will even to show can equally deadly farts. Trust me,these kind of girls are few and far between.Why would girl be interested in who can pee the longest?
Remembering the six most important things to remember about dating girls will take you farther than anything else you could have planned when it comes to having a great time on your dates. This is because actions based on the wrong premise are bound to fail.while it is important to be natural,it is also important to give each other time to get to be together.If you are simply too gross or loud on your first date,you probably won't be getting new ones with that same girl.
“Be yourself,” is a good advice up to an extent. If being yourself includes any of the forbidden behavior in the six most important things to remember when dating girls list, don’t be yourself. Be better. Remember these six most important things about dating girls and have a great time finding the love of your life.Remember dating is not a game.
Click on the magic of relationships to find even more ways to enjoy your relationships.
The first thing to remember is that girls are not boys.What you consider funny they may consider gross.
They may not think it is funny to make noises by placing your hands over your mouth like if you just farted.It is not funny to pull off your shirt and try to lick your armpit. Even if they have had too much to drink, they don’t like this. Do not set your self up for failure.
The second thing to remember do not think it is cool to tell stories about your previous exploits.Would you like to hear her own previous stories with the minute details?My guess is know.In that case treat your date the respect you would like to be treated. They do not want to know about the blonde who had nothing to say but had the most amazing body ever created. Nor do they think it is awesome to have their guy greeted by every lady in the restaurant. Take your date to a different place just to be on the safe side and do not mention your previous relationships..
The third thing to remember is to show up on time.It is rude to keep you date waiting or fail to show at all.By being there on time ,you say with more than words to your girl that she is very important to you.Trust me every body wants to be treated with respect and dignity.No matter what,do not be late.If you cannot help it,call ahead of time and explain.
The fourth thing to remember is that most girls would be happy to see you looking good.. They do not like to see you show up at their door in your dirty old jeans with a cheap fast food in your hand. Trust me on this one. Maybe later – way later, like after the kids have grown up – it will be okay for this kind of slip of the mind to happen. But for now, please, guys:shave and look good ,let your date know that she means something to you.
The fifth thing to remember is that your girl will not be impressed with how cheap you are. She will not not love it when you pull out buy-one-get-one-free coupons at the restaurant cash register. There is nothing wrong with a bargain, especially in these tough economic times, but use those freebies when you go out with your dad ,if you ever do that.May be your friends will admire your smarts if you do that, but don't give your date the impression that she is not worth that much.
The sixth thing remember is that girls may not find burping and peeing contests hilariously interesting and entertaining. Who can come up with most-silent-but-most-deadly one without any prior warning is nothing to be proud of, according to most girls.Their might be a few who will even to show can equally deadly farts. Trust me,these kind of girls are few and far between.Why would girl be interested in who can pee the longest?
Remembering the six most important things to remember about dating girls will take you farther than anything else you could have planned when it comes to having a great time on your dates. This is because actions based on the wrong premise are bound to fail.while it is important to be natural,it is also important to give each other time to get to be together.If you are simply too gross or loud on your first date,you probably won't be getting new ones with that same girl.
“Be yourself,” is a good advice up to an extent. If being yourself includes any of the forbidden behavior in the six most important things to remember when dating girls list, don’t be yourself. Be better. Remember these six most important things about dating girls and have a great time finding the love of your life.Remember dating is not a game.
Click on the magic of relationships to find even more ways to enjoy your relationships.
Friday, October 15, 2010
Know yourself so you can love better.
Most of the time we seek to improve because we are not happy with our situation or circumstances in life.One of such circumstances may be our relationship with ourselves or others.As one of my friends said in his Facebook posting being in love can be complicated.
Of course we could take the shot gun approach and work out on a difficult or complicated relationships or we could take our time and try to make things right.However the first step in this process can be quite painful because it involves turning the light on ourselves.We need to know ourselves so we can love better.
To do this we need to understand ourselves and begin our journey of transformation.One of the things we need to remember is that nobody has been able to completely change themselves to the person they want to be.We need to be patient with our selves because there is always a difference between the principles we profess and what we actually do.
Have you succeeded in transforming yourself?Probably not.Why are you surprised to find out that the same holds true for others? Why are you surprised to find out that your spouse,boyfriend or girlfriend still has faults?
I think one of the reasons we fail to see our own faults but that of others is because of our personality blind spots.Just like in the blind spot of a seeing eye is not seen by that eye though it is open,so do we fail to see our own imperfections.
Keeping this in mind will help us to be less critical of ourselves and others.If we want to change others and make our relationships better we need to start by changing ourselves first.We could start by cutting down on arguments and being more patient with ourselves.
Arguments only raise our passions and emotions negatively.Believe you me unless we learn how to maintain our emotional balance,we cannot change our circumstances or situation.To really change we need to focus on one aspect of our behavior at a time.
The less time we spend complaining and blaming others .the more time we can put into speaking more positively ourselves and others.Know your self so that can love better.
One of the best ways to know more about ourselves and others is to ask questions.Click on Questions that help couples to get even more out of your relationships.
Of course we could take the shot gun approach and work out on a difficult or complicated relationships or we could take our time and try to make things right.However the first step in this process can be quite painful because it involves turning the light on ourselves.We need to know ourselves so we can love better.
To do this we need to understand ourselves and begin our journey of transformation.One of the things we need to remember is that nobody has been able to completely change themselves to the person they want to be.We need to be patient with our selves because there is always a difference between the principles we profess and what we actually do.
Have you succeeded in transforming yourself?Probably not.Why are you surprised to find out that the same holds true for others? Why are you surprised to find out that your spouse,boyfriend or girlfriend still has faults?
I think one of the reasons we fail to see our own faults but that of others is because of our personality blind spots.Just like in the blind spot of a seeing eye is not seen by that eye though it is open,so do we fail to see our own imperfections.
Keeping this in mind will help us to be less critical of ourselves and others.If we want to change others and make our relationships better we need to start by changing ourselves first.We could start by cutting down on arguments and being more patient with ourselves.
Arguments only raise our passions and emotions negatively.Believe you me unless we learn how to maintain our emotional balance,we cannot change our circumstances or situation.To really change we need to focus on one aspect of our behavior at a time.
The less time we spend complaining and blaming others .the more time we can put into speaking more positively ourselves and others.Know your self so that can love better.
One of the best ways to know more about ourselves and others is to ask questions.Click on Questions that help couples to get even more out of your relationships.
Saturday, October 9, 2010
How to make up with letters or Notes
Writing letters or notes is one of the ways we can let others know how we feel about them.These days people do not write too many letters or notes any more.They just text or e-mail our loved ones.
However,there is something about letters that make them stand out. One reason is that writing letters requires a lot more thought,energy and time than texting or e mails.This is precisely why letter writing or writing poems is one of the best ways to make up after a break up.
This allows you to gather your thoughts and talk to yourself.Self talk is very important for emotional clarity.First of all tell yourself what you feel about the situation or circumstance in your relationship.Why are things not as good as you would like them to be?Why are thinking of breaking up?Is it because of lack of understanding?Is it because of constant criticism?
Write a letter,note or poem to yourself answering these questions.Tell yourself your own explanations for this situation.Be honest with your feelings and your role in these disagreements.This will help you get over your own emotional hurdles then you can write your loved one and tell hm or her how much they mean to you.
Remember if you are not sincere ,telling your loved one he or she is an angel ,won't cut it.It will just seem phony.
Another reason I encourage notes after a fight is that weeks later it gives you a snap shot of your feelings and reactions during a fight.This will help you learn emotional lessons.It will help you learn when to speak and when to listen .This will certainly be a great help when next you have a disagreement.
Yes next time!One of the keys to having a happy relationship not dominated by stress,is to find ways to disagree without getting into a fight.Writing letters,notes and poems will be a great help.Just do it.!
Visit The relationship mending system to find out even more ways to revive and enjoy your relationships.
However,there is something about letters that make them stand out. One reason is that writing letters requires a lot more thought,energy and time than texting or e mails.This is precisely why letter writing or writing poems is one of the best ways to make up after a break up.
This allows you to gather your thoughts and talk to yourself.Self talk is very important for emotional clarity.First of all tell yourself what you feel about the situation or circumstance in your relationship.Why are things not as good as you would like them to be?Why are thinking of breaking up?Is it because of lack of understanding?Is it because of constant criticism?
Write a letter,note or poem to yourself answering these questions.Tell yourself your own explanations for this situation.Be honest with your feelings and your role in these disagreements.This will help you get over your own emotional hurdles then you can write your loved one and tell hm or her how much they mean to you.
Remember if you are not sincere ,telling your loved one he or she is an angel ,won't cut it.It will just seem phony.
Another reason I encourage notes after a fight is that weeks later it gives you a snap shot of your feelings and reactions during a fight.This will help you learn emotional lessons.It will help you learn when to speak and when to listen .This will certainly be a great help when next you have a disagreement.
Yes next time!One of the keys to having a happy relationship not dominated by stress,is to find ways to disagree without getting into a fight.Writing letters,notes and poems will be a great help.Just do it.!
Visit The relationship mending system to find out even more ways to revive and enjoy your relationships.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Making up with your ex
Making up with your ex is usually not easy.This is because every break up is associated with different problems.
Every body has their own justification for the break up.
To overcome this requires that each person admits what they have done to make the relationship bad.This is not easy.However ,if this step is not taken making up with your ex will not occur.
The main thing to remember is finding out what went wrong is just the beginning.Making up will be a process.This will require a sequential structured approach to getting along.Part of this approach will be to learn to say,"I am sorry".This will also require finding an acceptable way to communicate and share your feelings with your ex.
To really make up with your ex you need to find ways to communicate frequently.This can be done through phone calls,text messaging or e-mails.Do not rush into trying to make up with your ex because in any difficult task requires time and a series of simple steps.
The first simple step is to seek to become friends again.This will help you to gradually begin to remind each other what you really liked in your relationship and how you can rekindle that.
Remember Rome was not built in a day,but if you truly commit to consistent little acts of love a deeper relationship can be rekindled.Visit The relationship mending system to learn ways to make consistent daily little acts of love part of your life and relationships.
Every body has their own justification for the break up.
To overcome this requires that each person admits what they have done to make the relationship bad.This is not easy.However ,if this step is not taken making up with your ex will not occur.
The main thing to remember is finding out what went wrong is just the beginning.Making up will be a process.This will require a sequential structured approach to getting along.Part of this approach will be to learn to say,"I am sorry".This will also require finding an acceptable way to communicate and share your feelings with your ex.
To really make up with your ex you need to find ways to communicate frequently.This can be done through phone calls,text messaging or e-mails.Do not rush into trying to make up with your ex because in any difficult task requires time and a series of simple steps.
The first simple step is to seek to become friends again.This will help you to gradually begin to remind each other what you really liked in your relationship and how you can rekindle that.
Remember Rome was not built in a day,but if you truly commit to consistent little acts of love a deeper relationship can be rekindled.Visit The relationship mending system to learn ways to make consistent daily little acts of love part of your life and relationships.
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